dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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