we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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