You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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