STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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