Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Dear god my vagina.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
