let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
