the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
