hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
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