why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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