Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Randomize