Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
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