We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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