if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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