I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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