she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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