I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
