farters have to be the big spoon...
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize