well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize