everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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