When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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