so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
