In the future we'll all be gay
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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