two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize