I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
only you would photoshop your dick
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
