Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Randomize
