no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
