I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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