i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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