My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
My life is pants optional.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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