nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
