google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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