dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
