i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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