Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
