Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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