I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
