im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Randomize
