I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
