no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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