Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
No I am not eating basil off your cock
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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