.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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