i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
it glows. i had to have it.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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