its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
