Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
