Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
