they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
