just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
