even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
