we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Shitshow foam night was such a success
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize
