He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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