her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
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