I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
