I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
